Well this past weekend has definately been a weekend full of memories. This time last year Cooper was born on October 27th and then passed on October 29th. On the 30th we were at the funeral home making arrangements for the son we so longed to hold, and the 31st was the day we laid him to rest. Somehow though, we have been filled with a peace that can only come from our most gracious Heavenly Father. I had some friends ask me whether I thought Coop's birthday or angelversary would be harder and I told them about this peace we had been given. Not only was Cooper born premature, but with his heart condition there are so many more obstacles we would be facing. Had he been born full-term, we most likely would be facing a 2nd open heart surgery around this time and we would be somewhere else other than Memphis considering I would have liked to have him repaired at CHOP or University of Michigan. I would possibly be up there on my own as someone would have to continue working and there would just have been a lot of decisions to make. Now don't get me wrong, if I could do it all over again and still have Cooper here with me I would do whatever it would take. I would give my life for him just to hold him one more time. I would not mind having an imperfect baby that I spent all of my time with in and out of hospitals but I just feel that this was the plan that God had set out for us.
This past Sunday we had flowers on the alter of our church in memory of Cooper and they were just beautiful. We also went out there to his gravesite on his birthday and took him a pumpkin that had been painted with a University of Memphis Tiger on it. His daddy was very proud to have found such a pumpkin and knew Coop needed it :) Clay was able to stay in-town since last Wednesday so that was really helpful. Thank you to those of you who continue to read our blog and we do continue to ask for prayers and with time things do get easier but there will forever be a hugh hole in Clay and I's heart where Cooper's memory will always be.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3: 5-6
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Happy Birthday Daddy!
Well today is Clay's birthday. This time last year we were admitted to the hospital in pre-term labor with Cooper and we were unable to celebrate this day. We plan to go to dinner this evening with family and try to stay focused on the positive things of today. Luckily Clay did not have to go out of town today but was able to stay around the house and spend some time with me and Maggie (our yorkie). She has become so rotten since we have been living at my mom's and I am not sure what she is going to do once we move. On that note we did find a home and our contract has been acepted! We are sooo excited and the planned closing date is November 1st. I have to meet with the inspector tomorrow at 12:00 and following that the appraisal will take place and hopefully things will continue to go well. It is in East Memphis and is smaller than Clay and I wanted in the beginning but was just too cute to pass up. We are ready to have a place of our own again and even more excited that Maggie will have a yard to run in. Granted, she does not really know how to play by herself so I am not sure how much she will use the yard unless we are outside with her but it will still be worth it. Please continue to keep us in your prayers as the following weeks continue and we get through the first anniversary of losing Cooper, but celebrating that he is with our Heavenly Father.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Coping
Well I realized that I have not been on here for quite a few months and I guess life has just gotten away from me lately. Clay and I have been extremely busy with work and just life in general lately. I am still at the PICU at LeBonheur and Clay is still doing sales for Trane heating and Air-Conditioning. There are still times when work is hard, with all the babies up there that have heart defects and just seeing the trial and tribulations that their families face. I have realized more and more lately how truly blessed Clay and I were with the way God handled Cooper's short life. As much as I would have wanted him to thrive while he was in the NICU the likelihood of that happening would have been slim to none and the peace that God has given us in taking him home to be with our Heavenly Father is much more than I could ask for. Granted, I would give it all up to have more earthly time with him but God has also shown Clay and I how short our time here on earth is and that our eternity with Him is what we should look forward to.
Since it appears that my last post was about the March of Dimes walk I guess I should comment on what a wonderful success that was. I was so humbled to have so many wonderful people there to walk with me on that day and many others that helped donate to Cooper's Troop. I believe out grand total was around $5,000 which far exceeded the $2,000 goal that I had set for ourselves. There was a great banquet during the summer that Clay and I attended where we received multiple awards including, 3rd place in t-shirt, 1st place for new family team, 2nd place overall and one more I believe. It was so exhilarating to realize that we had done all that to help other babies and to support such a wonderful cause. It is definitely a tradition that we would like to continue yearly and we already have some great ideas to help raise money for next year. We pray that Cooper is our only baby that we have to walk for and that God blesses us with a full-term healthy baby next time.
Other things that are going on is we sold our house down in Harbor Town in August and since we had to be out within 2 weeks we moved in with my mom, where we still sit. We have not had much luck finding a home that we like within our price range. The market is so slow around here lately and we are just praying that God's will give us a sense of peace and send us a home in His perfect timing.
Of course with it being October only one thing really comes to mind for me. The 1 year anniversary of Cooper's birth and death. October 18th is Clay's birthday and is also the day that I was admitted to the hospital in pre-term labor at 24 weeks gestation with Cooper. I then sat in labor and delivery for the next 9 days when I delivered Cooper on October 27th at 3:38 in the am. I still can't believe it has been a year and that this anniversary is already upon us. Cooper was in the NICU for 2 days before passing on October 29th when Clay and I left the hospital with all our hopes and dreams shattered and with empty arms. I know this month is going to be difficult but Clay and I have felt such a sense of peace about everything that happened that we can't help but still raise our hands up to God and praise His name. Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers during the next few weeks and I promise to update this blog more frequently from here on out.
God Bless,
Mommy and Daddy to Cooper Walker
Melody and Clay
Since it appears that my last post was about the March of Dimes walk I guess I should comment on what a wonderful success that was. I was so humbled to have so many wonderful people there to walk with me on that day and many others that helped donate to Cooper's Troop. I believe out grand total was around $5,000 which far exceeded the $2,000 goal that I had set for ourselves. There was a great banquet during the summer that Clay and I attended where we received multiple awards including, 3rd place in t-shirt, 1st place for new family team, 2nd place overall and one more I believe. It was so exhilarating to realize that we had done all that to help other babies and to support such a wonderful cause. It is definitely a tradition that we would like to continue yearly and we already have some great ideas to help raise money for next year. We pray that Cooper is our only baby that we have to walk for and that God blesses us with a full-term healthy baby next time.
Other things that are going on is we sold our house down in Harbor Town in August and since we had to be out within 2 weeks we moved in with my mom, where we still sit. We have not had much luck finding a home that we like within our price range. The market is so slow around here lately and we are just praying that God's will give us a sense of peace and send us a home in His perfect timing.
Of course with it being October only one thing really comes to mind for me. The 1 year anniversary of Cooper's birth and death. October 18th is Clay's birthday and is also the day that I was admitted to the hospital in pre-term labor at 24 weeks gestation with Cooper. I then sat in labor and delivery for the next 9 days when I delivered Cooper on October 27th at 3:38 in the am. I still can't believe it has been a year and that this anniversary is already upon us. Cooper was in the NICU for 2 days before passing on October 29th when Clay and I left the hospital with all our hopes and dreams shattered and with empty arms. I know this month is going to be difficult but Clay and I have felt such a sense of peace about everything that happened that we can't help but still raise our hands up to God and praise His name. Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers during the next few weeks and I promise to update this blog more frequently from here on out.
God Bless,
Mommy and Daddy to Cooper Walker
Melody and Clay
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)